SynergyFlow Pro
Now with 47% more synergy

SynergyFlow Pro

Leveraging synergies to optimize your workflow paradigm.

Still doing things manually? How delightfully vintage. SynergyFlow Pro is the enterprise-grade, AI-free, artisanally hand-coded SaaS solution you never knew you didn't need. While everyone else is "disrupting" with AI, we're here doing things the old-fashioned way: slowly, expensively, and with a 47-minute onboarding webinar.

Start Your Free Trial* Watch the 47-Minute Demo

*Free trial requires a 3-year enterprise commitment and your firstborn's email address.

Trusted by companies that couldn't afford Salesforce

Initech Globex Corp Hooli Pied Piper Massive Dynamic Dunder Mifflin

Features You'll Pretend to Use

Each feature was carefully designed in a series of meetings that could have been emails.

Real-Time Synergy Dashboard

Watch your synergies update in real-time. What are synergies? Nobody knows, but ours are the fastest. Our dashboard refreshes every 30 seconds whether you want it to or not.

Blockchain-Adjacent Technology

We don't use blockchain, but we sit near some developers who do. Close enough for your investor pitch deck. We also looked at a YouTube video about NFTs once.

AI-Free Guarantee™

While everyone else is replacing their workforce with chatbots, we proudly employ actual humans who make actual mistakes. Every bug is handcrafted with love and a complete lack of unit tests.

Enterprise-Grade Security

Your data is protected by a password. Yes, one password. But it's a really good one. We also have a padlock icon in the footer, which legally counts as encryption in most jurisdictions.

Pricing That Makes Sense (To Us)

All plans include unlimited regret and a complimentary onboarding call you'll forget to attend.

Startup

For companies that put "AI" in their pitch deck but just use if-else statements.

$49 /mo
  • Up to 5 synergies
  • Basic paradigm shifting
  • Email support (we'll respond eventually)
Get Started
Most Popular*

Enterprise

Includes a dedicated account manager who will ghost you after onboarding.

$499 /mo
  • Unlimited synergies
  • Advanced paradigm shifting
  • Priority support (24-48 business days)
  • Custom SSO (Single Sign-Off)
Start Enterprise Trial

*Popular among people who clicked this by accident

Enterprise Plus Ultra

For companies that expense software without reading what it does.

Contact Sales
  • Everything in Enterprise
  • Quarterly "strategy alignment" dinners
  • A branded Yeti tumbler
  • Your logo on our "Customers" page
Contact Our 1 Sales Rep

Don't Take Our Word For It

Seriously, don't. But here's what some people said anyway.

"SynergyFlow Pro helped us pivot from a blockchain startup to an AI startup. Still no revenue, but the dashboard looks absolutely incredible."

CB

Chad Broman

CEO, TechBro Ventures

"I have no idea what this product does but my manager said we need it for Q3 OKRs. So here we are. 5 stars."

AD

Anonymous Developer

Senior Vice Junior Engineer, Initech

"Finally, a tool that generates as many reports as I ignore. The synergy metrics are particularly meaningless. A must-have for any enterprise."

KP

Karen Pemberton

VP of Operations, Dunder Mifflin

Ready to Leverage Some Synergies?

Join the thousands* of companies already pretending to use SynergyFlow Pro.

Start Your Free Trial

*Actual number: 3. And one of them is our CEO's mom.